I have probably been the worst at keeping up with making contributions to this blog, which is not surprising since it is not a form of reflection that falls within my comfort zone. I am rather introverted and my introspection remains mostly inside my head. Two of the best words I think that people have described me as are wallflower and sponge, I soak up as much as I can watching and listening and comparing and reflecting without much of an urge to add anything unless I feel my unique perspective will truly add something useful. Honestly, if it weren't for teaching I would probably be a complete recluse but for some reason despite my awkward loner nature teaching makes me whole. Teaching is one of the very few activities in which I can be in a room full of people and not feel completely out of place and uncomfortable.
Even as I'm writing this I am not sure what the point of this entry is except to push myself outside of my comfort zone in hopes that it will help me to expand as a functional human being and develop my professional teaching self into the best manifestation of Ms. Pugh that I can. That really is my ultimate goal, to be better for myself and for my future students and that goal has become the heart of my observation of the world. How can I share this with my students? What kinds of students in what kinds of situations would benefit from this idea of text or image? Those questions have become an underlying heartbeat to my existence and I guess that means the the best word to describe me is no longer sponge or wallflower but teacher. So in spite of my lack of outgoing nature I think I am ahead of the curve compare to those lively, charismatic people who do not really know themselves because I can undoubtedly look in the mirror and know I am looking at a teacher.
Kim this is beautiful! I also feel the same about this blog sort of suppsed to be like our jounral and feeling as if it were a risk to say whatever really is on our minds, just because we are self conscious (especially after tech class and learning about all those iresponsible facebook remarks previous teachers posted and got consequences for)- What I am trying to say is that I am also an observer, taking in what I see and then reacting to it. I also get energy from people which makes me hope that my future students will all be full of energy: ) I'm sure that won't be a problem with the high percentage of students with ADHD. I feel as blogging is getting me out of my comfort zone. I was perfectly fine with a writing journal, but knowing that writing can become so much easier and publishing it for a larger audience is great but some things feel better just on paper, I feel. I am excited to begin our next semester but nervous a bit because of curiosity of where my placement might, yet I still know, like you, that only in a classroom setting is where I don't mind getting out of my comfort zone.
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